Recently I got into a conversation with my co-workers, my much younger co-workers to be clear. I wanted the opinion of the younger generation as to what they feel is or is not acceptable for women over 40 to wear. What makes us look foolish because we’re trying too hard or just outright wrong. Here’s the list they came up with.
Butt Branding – Juicy, Pink, bedazzled or any of those decorative words that appear on sweatpant butts. That’s more for teens than adults of any age.
Nail Crackling or any nail art – again leave that for the younger set.
Feathers in hair – there was debate on this one for a bit. It was decided that for the “artistic” group, this is OK. Steven Tyler a hit, cubicle dweller mom, no.
Any “shopping” in daughter’s closet. They’re your daughter’s clothes, not yours. Madonna and Lourdes can be a good example of this one. Too often Madonna is wearing similar or even sharing the same clothing.
Careful with spray tan – glow is nice, the Magda look is not and it just ages women over 40
Platform flip-flops – they’re difficult to walk in and again should be left for the teens.
Leggings with short shirts – any age, it’s just wrong. Wear them with a tunic, not a short shirt.
Frosted blonde hair and overly dark hair – both are just aging and not flattering at all. Soften the very dark hair with a brown shade or subtle highlights. And the frosted tip went out in the 70’s.
No visible tramp stamps – Most that have them in their teens or 20’s will be regretting them when they hit their 40’s anyway.
Frosty lips or eyes – glow is in, not frost or heavy sparkle.
Jeans – no “mom” jeans that ride above the belly button like they used to wear in the old Saturday Night Live skit. Or the opposite, too low cut jeans like Kiera Knightly here. She looks great, someone over 40? Not so much. Both are unflattering in their own ways. Find a good fitting and flattering pair of jeans.
What do you think of this list my co-workers have put together? I’d love to hear the opinions from women over 40!
For a while I was scared, because I thought you were going to tell me that my beloved dark nail polish colors were forbidden. But I don’t mind being told that I shouldn’t wear crackle polish or nail art, because I don’t like them, anyway!
I completely agree with the rest of your list. 😀
I was a little leary of what this post was going to be, but ultimately, I laughed and totally agreed! BTW- I’m going on 35 so I’m in a weird purgatory of what’s acceptable, but I think I would definitely heed the advice given in this post!
I agree with most of it, and I am over 40. But frosty products in make up I do like.
Very tight sweater or tee shirt with OBVIOUS light hair. EWWW!!
I agree with everything on the list except nail art/crackle polish. I like nail art and I’m 41 next month. I suppose it depends on what your intention is, I love colourful interesting nails but mine are also short. I suppose if I had super long talons then it would look a bit stupid.
This is great and I hope you don’t mind that I am going to borrow it to post on my biz FB page. The majority of my clients are between 35-50 so this is perfect!
I agree TOTALLY!! As I age, I intend to get more classic. And when I get really OLD, it’s going to be Georgia O’Keefe style all the way…artsy fartsy!
I don’t like people telling me -or anyone else, for that matter – what to do, especially because of the age of the person(s) involved. IMO, some of these may be inappropriate for ANYONE, others are fads of the moment, but I won’t be the one pointing and laughing or whispering about them! When it comes down to it, don’t worry so much about what others think – whether they’re younger, older, or the same age as you. Do whatever makes you feel great! And remember that fashion and fads AREN’T important, it’s personal STYLE that IS!
I’m over 40, English is my second language, stay home Mom, christian woman, I follow every rules written and unwritten, I’m well educated, happy married for 14 years, with a lot of things going on in my life right now, I’m not about to let myself to add more rules that is unnecessary or to follow what ever people things that woman over 40 supposed to do or not to do! especially in fashion, I only go with 2 question, ” is this appropriate for me?” or, “inappropriate?” means I show my body part that is not supposed to see by other people or having people to see my unflattering body part, other that if it is about nail polish, shoes or hair color, I don’t care what is the rules I ONLY KNOW, IF IT IS LOOK GOOD ON ME I WEAR IT! so far my husband, my family and my close friend love the way I look. one thing that I don’t understand, people wanting so bad to look younger, pay expensive to look younger ( plastic surgery, Botox and everything else) but NO MATTER HOW YOUNG YOUR FACE LOOK, WHEN YOU DRESS UP OLDER, YOU WILL STILL LOOK OLDER, IF YOU WANT TO LOOK YOUNGER DON”T DRESS UP LIKE YOUR AGE, DRESS UP YOUNGER, YOUNG ATTITUDE! for all I know fashion don’t determine by age! IF IS LOOK GOOD ON YOU, WEAR IT! btw Madonna is not my style icon so does Steven Taylor!
Three cheers for sharing this article. Could not agree more!!!
This article is not telling you want or not to wear it is simply asking a few younger women how they perceive us (mores mature women!)
We found their opinion really fascinating but not surprising. “Out of the mouths of babes”…and a good wake up call for us all!
Thanks! I thought it would spark quite a bit of controversy, yet many women agreed. I think many items on the list were just plain common sense, but sometimes we get in a rut and don’t step out to take a good look to see if we are really trying too hard to look young and we just end up looking ridiculous!
I will be 50 in a few months and I also agree with the points made in the article.I want to look good for my age but I don’t want to look like a teenager!!
whoa! I gotta cry foul on the nail crackle!!!! I love nail art, especially crackle, which comes from my background as an artist where I used to antique and crackle paintings. It’s loads of fun. So puleeeze, I can haz crackle?
I agree with all of the above “don’ts”. I work in a 5 star resort, and you wouldn’t believe what I see. May I add tops with no bra, and bra straps intentionally showing to the list?
Good ones, Bobbi!
Love the list and it prevented me from getting a feather in my hair. I think they are adorable and was only going to get 1 – that matched my hair color – but at 52, I guess I will pass on this trend.
Well,more rules to try to figure out. I say stick with
the classics and follow JoJami’s ideas for making yourself look fabulous, not bizarre. I have always felt that feathers belonged to the cratures that grew them and maybe that’s why they should keep them?
Frankly, teenagers who wear these things (spray tan! tramp stamps!! butt branding!!!) should think twice. If they think older women would look ridiculous in them, thye might wonder what we think of -them- wearing them. And they should ponder what they’ll think when their co-workers pull the pics from Facebook in 20 years. Even 10 years..
I’m 64. I wear what I like and what looks good on me. Changing my nail polish to a different “risky” color every week is a pleasure. I don’t care what under-40s think about how I look — and I have to say, I look great! I’m still very pretty and wear classic styles.. but I am shopping for a glitter strip to add to my hair. Have a good time, be kind, and don’t worry about what the kids think – they don’t even know what they think half the time.
I’m not 40 yet, just 25, but I agree completely with this list. I’m a self-proclaimed image consultant and LOVE to help others. I read the 40+ fashion blogs to see what to do with my more mature gals…:D
I’m 40 y/o petite woman (but look like if I’m 35 still) and changed my hair color to Crimson Red recently. I wear it long (at the middle of my back) and straight with hair extensions for more volume.
Do you think I made a mistake dying my hair this color at this age or is it okay still…? Thanks for your help!
I say live and let live. As long as you know you don’t look ridiculous or are too heavy to wear something you shouldn’t. I am 46 and do not like shopping in the Misses department because nothing flatters me…it instead, “fattens” me!
Honestly, I could care less what 20-somethings think anymore than they care what I think. Let’s get that straight. Secondly, Madonna looks fine in the outfit above. She should also get the Steven Tyler artistic pass. She’s Madonna and she doesn’t give a sh* what some 20-year old thinks.
Those of us in the real world should already know better than to wear questionable attire and that includes anyone over college age. Yeah, I think these “rules” should apply to them too. There’s wearing trashy crap, there’s wearing trendy stuff, and there’s wearing some ugly, middle aged uniform because you’re too scared of the judgement of people young enough to be your kids.
I’m 46 and I dress how I want with class. I keep up with fashion and I know what looks good on me and have no interest in dressing like a club hopping teenager. But straight legs, flats, big earrings, boots, colors and body skimming fashion, yes. Sparkly nail polish and crazy eye makeup, no.
In short, I don’t need anyone to tell me how to dress or approve or disapprove. I’m a grown-ass woman and I have the experience to know what I want and how to use it. Thank you.
I agree with everything but the nail polish. If I do something like that I reserve it for my toes, only.
I am about to be 70. I am petite and often have to look at clothes that are far to young for me. Not enough sleeves which it the biggest groan of older women. I look the people like Barbara Walters for fashion but then again she has the money to get it just right. I only wear a size 6 and still have not got the the rolly polly look that needs to be hidden. Still when you are not tall it is terrible looking for age appropriate clothing. I think the worst thing a mature woman can do is have long flowing hair. What a shock it is to see that and when she turns to face you she is an obvious senior citizen.
Your list is very entertaining. Is frosty eye shadow cool at any age?
For me the key to unleashing my style once again in middle age was about confidence which developed for real from some fabulous free life coaching I received from Venus Cow.
People should wear whatever makes them feel good, even if it breaks the fashion police rules. My pet hate is seeing an over 40 rolling pastlooking fresh and happy,then hearing the snigger “mutton dressed a slamb”. Who cares what you think if the lady wearer thinks she looks great?
good to know..I am 48 and dress young but fortunately not a single of those in the list is on my wardrobe..never been I guess…but I still shop and wear junior clothes…I am petite…